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Co-workers can be great friends. They can make your working day a pleasure… or a pain. So how do you tell your colleagues that their behaviour is irritating you without sounding intolerant?

Your cubicle buddy gossips about people at work. How do you tell them your just not interested without sounding anti-social? The best approach is the direct one. “Hey Josie, enough already! There are heaps more interesting things to talk about than Kylie and Simon. What are you and Bruce doing for your holidays next month?” The rationale is not to indicate that you’re bored or uncomfortable gossiping about your co-workers, but to shift the spotlight over to the gossiper to make them feel like the centre of attention.

Your co-worker talks too much about their personal life. The direct way of handling this is to upstage them. If their dog has had his nails clipped, your dog just won Best Dog at the Easter show. Or even better, think up a whole lot of minutiae from your life and regale her with it. Her aim is to impress you, so by taking the wind out of her sails, she’ll soon be looking for a new audience.  However, if you can’t do this, then respond only with “really?” or the odd grunt.

You’re colleague is always late. Try making an innocent comment like: “Oh 9.15. Did Tracey say we could start a bit late? If she says, “No, I just slept in,” reply with, “I wonder if you’d mind covering for me this afternoon? I have to pick up my dry cleaning. 15 minutes should do it.” If she thinks it's okay to come in late, she needs to understand this behaviour has to be fair on other people.

Pasty Rowe is an author, corporate speaker, columnist, film and book critic and trainer in Business Etiquette. www.etiquette.com.au

Want more information? Then check out the winter Edition of Latte Magazine for the full story on Cubicle Confrontation, including in depth information, tips and examples!

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